I made this ornament to hang on our tree at home. Kate posted a photo of it on our Instagram account, and a bunch of people asked to buy it. They were probably just being nice, but I’m putting it on sale anyhow, so I can reach out to each of them individually and make them feel awkward and uncomfortable until they purchase one.
FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS
Q: How long does the battery last?
A: I don’t know. 10 minutes? A year? We’re not running some kind of battery-testing lab here, folks.
Q: Can I replace the battery?
A: I don’t know. Can you? There’s a hatch you can open to insert a new battery. But we don’t know you, so we can’t speak to whether or not you can pull off that sort of thing.
Q: Is it a good toy for kids?
A: Lord no. Button batteries are REALLY DANGEROUS for kids. Keep this away from kids!!! Plus, the flames are pointy.
Q: Will it set my tree on fire?
A: It's worth a try!
Q: Does it have to be used as a Christmas tree ornament?
A: If you’re wondering whether you can put it on your Tiffany’s charm bracelet, the answer is yes.
Q: I don’t know how to put this, but it looks a little...homemade. A little rough-around-the-edges.
A: Yes. It’s 3D-printed, and sometimes 3D-printed objects come out a little imperfect. Despite what door-to-door 3D printer salesmen would have you believe.
Q: Isn’t this ornament jinxing all of us? How do you know 2021 isn’t going to be even worse than 2020?
A: It probably WILL be worse. For one thing, we’ll all be a year older.